20 Things I Learned in 2013

#1 You CAN love to work out, love being healthy, and love your body.  It looks like this: 

I started in July, and now I have a butt, I have legs, and I have arms.  And if I took my hand out of a bag of chips for more than five minutes at a time, I'd probably have abs too.  

#2 If you're going to get a bird tattoo, don't get it with bandaged wings unless you want to look down at it daily and go, "Man, I'm a loser."

#3 Being called "vanilla" should be taken as a compliment, particularly when it comes from a criminal. 

#4 If you find yourself attracted to a man, he's gay, taken, or otherwise unavailable.  Get a cat instead. 

#5 There's nothing "tragically beautiful" about depression.

#6 If a boyfriend's former layover threatens to shank you, just call the police.

#7 If you have a legitimate stalker, just call the police.

#8 Keep the police on speed dial.

#9 Being happy is a choice, and gratitude is beautiful.  What you give, you receive.  

#10 Your mom is right about nearly everything.  Even when she's wrong, she's probably right.

  

#11 Hang around people who are better than you.

#12 There's nothing wrong with wanting to stay in and read.

#13 You will meet many gorgeous people.  The prettiest faces can still have the ugliest spirits.

#14 The quiet ones make the best friends.

#15 Generic toilet paper is a bad idea.

#16 Vegas is full of enormous parking garages.  If you think you'll remember where you parked, you won't.

#17 High standards don't make you a bitch.

#18 Learn something from everybody.

#19 If you're not willing to work for it, you don't deserve it.

#20 Fall in love with yourself first.